Some people are shocked to discover that I am HOH (Hard of Hearing), this is thanks to the fact that I lost my hearing slowly from childhood to adulthood. As an adult I sit with about a 55dB level loss with one ear worse then the other which means I am very near the cut off for understanding conversation. I thought it might be informative and maybe even funny for me to post some things you may not know about what it is like to be HOH.
1. I am not ignoring you: It happens at least once a day that someone tries to get my attention and I do not respond so they assume I am ignoring their efforts. The truth is I didn't hear you! It is okay to tap me on the shoulder, this is culturally appropriate and I rarely bite :)
2. I can hear some sounds clearly and other sounds are soft: This makes the harder to hear "softer" sounds nearly impossible to understand. Example, a movie that has background music. I can almost always hear music better then voices so the music takes over and I can no longer hear the voices. This often results in a TV that is unbearably loud to normal hearing and closed captions on at all times. It also means that if you play music in the car I can not hear you most of the time.
3. I get "sound overload" that leads to headaches: Since I have to concentrate so hard on what people are saying or what sounds mean I often get very tired or a headache from all the extra work. Therefore, I love my silence!
4. Lip reading is NOT fool proof: Example "ball" and "fall" look the same as well as many other words. This can become a comedy of errors really fast! Plus in order to lip read well I need decent light, little background noise and a person who talks normally and with out an accent. I usually catch about 75% of what a person says on a good day meaning I might miss a word or two and ask you to repeat several times. Sometimes I just cannot get it and need the person to rephrase or write it down.
5. I chose not to wear a hearing aid for good reasons: I hate hearing aids, they get nasty feedback and only make sounds you can already hear louder. They are a very simple device that consists of a microphone which picks up the sound, an amplifier which makes the sound louder and a speaker that sends the sound down your ear canal. It is the same device you would use to speak to a crowd of people. So what happens if your cell phone gets too close to that microphone? Yep, feedback, right in your ear...lovely. Even if they didn't get feedback it is not helpful that both the music and the speaking gets louder, if I am having a hard time understanding speech but I can hear the music having everything louder is not going to solve the problem. Don't worry, I get along just fine with out them!
6. I hate using the phone: My friends and family get mad at me that I rarely answer the phone. The main reason is I can barely hear anything on a phone and need the sounds to be amplified. The house needs to be quiet so I can concentrate and with two year old twins at home my house is almost never quiet!
7. I don't know that I am shouting: My
family used to get so mad at me for shouting all the time when I was
younger. I slowly learned to turn down my voice and realized that even
if I could not hear myself others can hear me. When I speak now I often
do not hear my own voice unless the environment is quiet.
8. I don't want to fix it: It is odd to others that I do not want hearing aids and I do not want to fix my "problem". In fact, I kinda wish I had more hearing loss. I often feel that it would be a more peaceful life. Plus I wouldn't hear all the stupid comments from strangers in public asking if my girls are twins, if they are a boy and a girl and why I was crazy enough to want more! Not hearing those would be awesome :)
9. I prefer using Sign Language: If you know some signs I would much prefer to have a conversation with you in ASL then try to read your lips. It gives my head a rest and I can relax and enjoy conversing with you.
10. I love the Deaf culture: I may not be deaf but I am Deaf. When we use "deaf" we are referring to an actual hearing loss or a medical condition or making a cliche comment like "my words fell on deaf ears." When you use Deaf you are talking about a person who identifies with the Deaf community, uses ASL, and perhaps works for the community or lives in the community. Even though I am HOH I still consider myself a part of the Deaf culture.
There are many more but it is time for this overdue mama to rest! Feel free to ask me questions below!
This was so helpful! Even though we have been friends for yeeeeears, I didn't know half of that. Thanks for being upfront and informative. It may be a while til I can sign more to you than milk, food, more, and bird, but I'll work on it :-) love you!
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